19 July 2010

Camp Highlights

Camp started off with a bang. The trip to the campgrounds got to be too long so we stopped to have a beer along the way. When we got there it was time to get that new damn circus tent up. It took us awhile and it took many tries. We debated on how much of camp to set up knowing there was going to be rain. We stopped after the circus tent and the portapotty tent. Then it was time for drinking. A few beers in and then we got the first round of communications to hit the deck. Tornadoes were in the area so we hopped in a vehicle and drove up to the bar that was on grounds. We all had almost full beers so we stood under the awning thingy while we finished them. The rain rolled in and we had to run to the bar door in it. Talk about soaked! We drank through that storm and soon returned back to camp to debate our next move. I was tired as hell and pulled out my chair for an hour nap. The girls kept drinking while I slept. Not even 5 minutes after I woke up the next round of communications hit of tornadoes that were even closer than the first round. This time we finished our beers before piling into the vehicle and headed up to the bar. This time the girl just bellied into the bar. I peaked my head out the door and saw the green and the wall cloud. I checked it out for a bit and then the rain hit again. That storm was worse than the first. The girls kept drinking and we soon had one down. I made a conscious decision not to drink anymore that night with the shitty weather. That and I didn't want to throw up. The girls drank and finally we decided it was time to head back to camp.

We all piled in the vehicle and thank God there were no real public roads to deal with. As we made our way back into our rustic corner of the grounds, we came up the shittiest part of the week. The road was completely flooded over. Luckily the girls were plowed and we just drove like a mad woman through it. We made it back to camp and that wasn't in too rough of shape. We blew up and made the beds and deposited the most drunk ones in. The rest of us munched and heard another storm on its way. Go fucking figure, severe with 70 mph plus winds. It was a fuck it moment of lets just go to bed. I watched the tent bend and blow. The rain came down in buckets and dripped in the middle. The sides wicked the water onto the walls of our pods to make our bedding wet. I was the only one sober enough to give a shit. I just wanted sleep.

As the night went on, I felt the bed getting softer and softer. My bed partner rolling closer and closer. Damn mattress had a leak. Before I knew it my bed partner had me pinned me down. She ain't no tiny girl either. Her trying to get out to go to the bathroom was a nightmare.

Morning light rolled around and I had to go to the bathroom really bad. Liquids are ok on site. Other things need to be deposited elsewhere. I hopped into my car and hoped the flooding we saw the night before had passed. Wrong. It was worse. I had to throw it into reverse and use the pit toilets. I was not pleased to find they were full but I still went.

Hubby came and brought us wood supplies with the big truck. The water sucked. We were stuck in there. We didn't wait too long and we piled into a truck and traversed the water to get to the lake. I killed a bottle of wine in there and got a little plowed. Dinner was fantastic that night. Bacon wrapped Jack Daniels beef tenderloin. That was an early night.

Friday came with more beautiful weather. We packaged up early and headed to the lake. The beer went down quick. I got drunk quick. We ate lunch and I tried to sober up. No dice. After lunch I got back on a floatie and passed out. I was so glad I put on sunscreen before doing that. That night turned into a huge party that included truth or dare and lap dances. That lap dance was done by a pro. I got a bit turned on by it. Ok. A lot turned on. Everyone once again got a bit plowed. Lapdance lady was the worst. She blew chunks. My friend partied with the Captain and she passed out on her hammock by the fire.

Saturday morning was marked with bitter sweet end. There was going to be more rain that night. The camp owners offered to put us on a different site. They didn't recommend staying where we were with the flooded road and all. We made an executive decision that we didn't want to go home so we took the party to a hotel. My friend did not bounce back too well. She slept in her hammock while the rest of us tore down camp. It was nice to know that we didn't have to hurry and get home and go to work the next day. The owners were actually douches to us that day and pissed us off bad enough that we will never go back there. I kinda liked that place but not if they are going to be asses. Off to the hotel we went.

The hotel was like an oasis in a desert. I checked us in to our two rooms. We were suppose to get standard rooms with the reward points that I used. We walked into the rooms and were pleasantly surprised. They were suites! Quickly changed and headed to the pool. The warm water with no fish and chlorine was a welcome change. It got invaded by tweens so we went back to the rooms and took showers and put our party pants on. We ordered some fantastic local pizza and worked on the beer-a-mid. We played games and drank. Then we hit the birthday cake. That was it for me. Chocolate cake put me into a sugar coma and I had to sleep. It felt so good to sleep in a real bed with real clean sheets and down comforter and air conditioning. I slept great.

Sunday was check out and we slept in a little bit. Breakfast there was impossible due to the tween invasion with their families. We went to a place next door for a breakfast buffet that was killer. I ate my belly til it was stuffed and then went home. I napped all afternoon. I watched movies all evening. Exciting end to my vacation.

Going back to work today was hard. I can't wait til I have another vacation!


Dana said...

If those were the highlights I'd hate to hear about the "low"-lights!

Next time I want pictures ... especially of the lap dances!

Average Chick said...

The lapdance happened so sudden I had no clue what to do except to tell myself to not pick up that chick and take her to the tent! Pictures would have done no justice...video may have given a clue..

JP said...

Yeah seriously I'm with Dana... PICS BITCH!

Damn I haven't done adult camping in... in... in... good god *hangs head in shame* I can't remember the last time I did adult camping... *sniffle*

JP said...

And btw... Why weren't you supposed to pick her up and take her to the tent???

Average Chick said...

It's ok JP. Not everyone can camp like rockstars :) I couldn't take her to the tent because she was a virgin to the group. Didn't want to scare her :)

Brian said...

I'm just impressed that you remembered as much as you did! Good lord, no way can I party like that any more, camping or not.